i feel anxious, i feel unwell. stressed and overwhelmed. my head is heavy. sunrays piercing through the dark clouds. something bad is bound to happen. a stabbing pain in my abdomen.
i’ve had bad dreams lately, nightmare seems a bit extreme for what it was, really. i’m not sleeping, not sleeping well at least. i wish i had called in sick. but i’m not sick and i have nowhere to go. mental health day anyone?
i made plans for today: wake up early and write, but my brain followed my womb into a rebellion. or is it my womb following my brain? couldn’t it just bleed already? pre-menstrual despair. yet here i am, braving this dreadful feeling, a battle for words, a battle for my self-esteem.
maybe that’s what the girl trend got right. souvenirs of a time when no cycle dictated our mood, motivation and well-being. before responsibilities take over. responsibility for our own body, responsibility for the reactions our bodies provoke, responsibility to always be the responsible one.
the sun pierces through dark clouds. the day is ending, it’s 15:23.
i started this new page, a spam account to remove any self-applied filters. not sure of the name. cold hearted bitch. i’ve mostly been called cold, often cold hearted, sometimes a bitch, but rarely a cold hearted bitch. i’m not really, but that’s another story.
Take care, the pre menstrual waiting game can be a rollercoaster. Be kind to yourself!